Conversations with a child 1

After finding a smallish postman figure...
3yo: where did you find it?
Me: wrapped up in your duvet.
3yo: [starts trying to hide it behind his back]
Me: what are you doing?
3yo: nothing...
Me: where are you trying to hide it?
...
Me: don't put it down your pants.
...
Me: don't put it in your bum, stop that...
Me I'm not taking you to A&E to explain why you have postman post stuck up your bum hole...